thanks everyone

I just wanted to say a great big thank you to all my friends who took the time to go and visit my friend's journal "clares capers"

I sure she will be over the moon that people have read it and left comments!

Bet-Bet has just left and will not be home now till thurday after school, she has gone on her monthly respite stay to Stowmarket. its surprising how much easier it is with 2 kids as opposed to 3! I will probably go into shutdown and keep falling asleep without her here...I do miss her terribly when she goes away. Only got my boys for company now as 50% of my family have left me...mum and dad and now my girl! Its a good job i habven't got any spare cash at the moment or I might have gone away myself for a couple of night's!

Anyway got baby Bryce to dress and charlieboy's packed lunch to make. Have got to go to parents evening at Bet-Bet's school tonight so will add an entry tonight to let you know how well she is getting on...I hope!

love and warm wishes to you all

my best friend

good evening to you all.

I just wanted to tell you that my bestest friend in the world has started a journal.

Please take a minute to drop by and tell her hello...just like you did me when i started.

Thanks very much!

http://journals.aol.co.uk/clareswhisper/clarescapers is the place you need to look.

Take care and hopefully you have all had a good weekend.

Love and cuddles!

oh woe is me!

Hello everybody, i hope you are well.

I knew it would happen...i'm sad and missing my mum and dad! They have only been gone since wednesday morning so its only been 3 and a bit days since i saw them...but i miss them so much it hurts. they are my rocks and apart from my friend clare, the only people i have in the world i can turn to.

They not allowed to ring while they are away as i normally manage to cry hearing their voices...not very grown up...and thats not fair on them as thay then think something has happened and i'm not telling them. I'll live just had to write how i was feeling!

Yesterday was traumatic! I went out in my car with baby Bryce and my godson Cory, (clares baby) to visit cory's grandad for a while, when i heard a deafening noise. thinking it was an aeroplane i ignored it. Several seconds later there it was again. "oh no, I hope thats not what i think it is" i thought to myself. I stopped the car and YES I had a puncture. OK I thought don't panic...get back in the car and drive up to a better place to stop (we were in the middle of the countryside on a narrow road with no path to pull onto), so I carried on up the road until I found a suitable place where I knew my boys would be safe and i was visable to other road users.

At this point i thought i had better phone up the grandad to tell him i would be late...no answer...thats ok he will answer shortly...at this point i could feel myself starting to panic. WHY did this happen when dad was away (told you something would!)

So i phoned grandad Bob again, "I'm now coming", he said "i'm on the drag won't be a minute". "I've got a puncture" as i said this I started to cry, and cry, and cry. Not because i was scared but because i had my babies and was worried!! "I'm now coming" grandad growled.

Suddenly I got a brain wave...WHY HAVEN'T YOU PHONED THE RAC YOU STUPID WOMAN??? So I did...they came..changed the wheel...and off we all went for a cuppa with grandad bob!

I feel so silly now for getting so upset!

We ended the day by going to Bet-Bets school for a coffee afternoon which was really good as i got to meet some of her new teachers and have a proper nose around the senior school where she started a few weeks ago!

Hope you all have a good weekend...casualty on the tv and homemade cottage pie for tea...yummy first one i have made in years!

love and hugs to all my friends!

hi

Hello to everyone i hope you are all well.

I haven't really been up to much and so couldn't think what to write, so have been having a nosey few days reading other people's journals!

we are all well at this end with no problems to report, makes a change. my parents are off on holiday feo 2 weeks tomorrow morning so you can gaurentee (spelt wrong sorry!) that by thursday something will go wrong and i will be all alone without ma and pa to sort me out! So i hope you are all going to be on-call!!

Baby Bryce is asleep at the moment...he said his first proper word yesterday-to my mum! she had him out by the road and he said "car"...don't be silly i said he never said that! This morning we were waving goodbye to bet-bet and he looked at me and said "CAR"!! Sorry to mother for not believing her...BRYCE I'M YOUR MUMMY..I'VE GOT THE SCAR TO PROVE IT! DO THINGS FOR ME FIRST NOT NANNY! Glad i've got that off my chest! I'm only messing i'm glad he does things for nanny first as they are so in love with eachother!

Thanks to sara for my bounce!

Can anyone give me any good ideas what i could write about...anything to do with my babies or that sort of thing...come on give me some ideas!

I hope you are all well.

take care and keep smiling

love Joanne

THIS IS FOR JOYCE TO WISH HER A SPEEDY RECOVERY. XxX

hello everyone

i woke this morning wondering what i would write in todays journal...it was decided for me earlier. several weeks ago it was arranged that i would have some more loft insulation put in. my dad decided that he would come and help as i would't be able to get 12 years of stuff from my loft on my own. so he came after lunch. it was ok for a while and was finding lots of rubbish that was thrown out, but then it happened...all my old love letters, valentines cards, engagement cards, wedding cards, birthday cards, birth and christening cards and tons of old photo's that i had recieved while married.

it really felt like i was being stabbed in the heart again. i will of been divored for 6 years in december but today has brought back all the abuse, suffering, and heartache that my children and i went through.this job really should of been done 6 years ago when it was still all raw but for some reason it got overlooked...i now wish it hadn't of been. i'm so glad that my kids were at school.

lucky for me my daddy was there to put his arms around me and give me a love. "thats it all over with now" he said "he isn't anywhere in the house anymore, i'm so sorry  you have had to go through it all again" at this point he gives me a big cuddle again and hands me some toilet roll to wipe my face...which now looked like a big dirty tomatoe (from all the sweat, tears and 12 years of dust!)

so today i feel like a chapter of my life has finally been closed. some people feel that closure is a good thing...it doesn't seem that way at the moment but maybe it will later.

i might oneday tell you about my marriage and what happened...i can't at the moment...as it feels like its just happened all over again.

sorry i'm depressed i promise to be happy tomorrow!

love and warm feelings for each and everyone of you.

all is well

well i'm back again!

bethany got on fine at the hospital. she had put on 4kilo's in weight which wasn't too good but we are getting used to that now. they done a blood test for this reason to check her thyroid gland medication is enough. i wouldn't be surprised if it isn't though as they have never changed the dose and she has been on them for a good 6 years now. it was quite funny when they took the blood...not for bet-bet but for everyone else. picture this is you can-me,16 stone, in my nice white gypsy skirt, rolling around the floor trying to keep her still for the doctor to put in the needle!! you should of been there to see it...i didn't look feminine when they had finished...more like someone who had been wearing the same skirt for 5 days...i was black!! no wonder people get MRSA in hospital it didn't look as though it had been swept let alone washed in weeks. they have also prescribed her some sleeping medication called melatonin. this drug is unlicensed oin the UK but widely used in the US, maybe some of you over the sea know of this?

On a brighter note i spoke to the deputy head at bet-bets school today and voiced my concers about bet-bet haveing sex education. i was really brave and said i didn't feel she was age appropriate to be taught such things. i have given them permission to discuss puberty, periods, and what is appropriate and unappropriate behaviour from other people and how she should act in certain circumstances. the school were very good and even agreed that bethany really wasn't mentally developed to learn about such things just yet, they said there is always a few that aren't ready for such information and it would be no problem excluding her, and others, from the lesson. thanks everyone who commented on this matter yesterday, you all gave me the courage to stand up and be heard...if i don't protect her nobody would!!

i hope you are all well and have had a good day. love and warm feelings

 

xxxxxx

my day

well good morning to you all

i will be doing my main journal entry tonight as Bethany has to go to the hospital this morning for her annual check up. this should be ok as we don't have any major issues at the moment that need addressing.

so i look forward to telling you later about how my day went and how my baby got on! hopefully i won't have to moan about anything today...my last two entries i was felling down in the dumps and this shows in the entries!!

love and warm feelings to you all

JOANNE

XxX

I CANNOT BELIVE IT

AS I SAID EARLIER I DECIDED TO WAIT UNTIL BETHANY CAME HOME FROM SCHOOL TODAY TO DO MY DIARY ENTRY...I'M SO GLAD I DID. FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DON'T KNOW ABOUT MY BET-BET (HER NICKNAME) SHE HAS MILD TO SERVERE DOWNS SYNDROME SO THEREFORE HAS THE MENTAL AGE OF ABOUT A 4/5 YEAR OLD.

SHE HAS COME HOME TODAY WITH AN OUTLINE OF WHAT LESSONS SHE WILL BE HAVING THIS SCHOOL TERM AND WHAT SORT OF THINGS WILL BE IN THE CIRRICULEM. WELL, I HAD A QUICK LOOK AND TO MY UTTER HORROR THEY ARE GOING TO BE TEACHING MY DEAR SWEET LITTLE GIRL SEX EDUCATION! IT HAS COMPLETELY THROWN ME FOR SIX AND I'M SITTING HERE NOT KNOWING WHAT TO THINK ABOUT THE WHOLE THING.

HOW CAN THESE PEOPLE EVEN THINK ABOUT TEACHING MY INNOCENT LITTLE GIRL ABOUT SUCH THINGS? I AM NOT A PRUDE AND HAVE HAD 3 KIDS SO KNOW WHAT ITS ALL ABOUT, MY 9 YEAR OLD BOY KNOWS WHAT IT IS ALL ABOUT (HE'S ALWAYS SAYING SOMETHING OR OTHER THAT HE HAS HEARD IN THE PLAYGROUND), BUT I JUST CANNOT GET THE MY HEAD AROUND THE FACT THAT THEY ARE GOING TO TEECH A VULNERABLE CHILD ABOUT SOMETHING THAT SHE REALLY HAS NO NEED TO KNOW ABOUT JUST YET.

SO WHAT DO I DO...SAY NOTHING AND SIT HERE WORRIED EVERYDAY. OR GO TO SCHOOL HAVE A GOOD OLD MOAN AND MAKE THEM THINK I'M A PARANOID MOTHER........I THOUGHT TRYING TO TEACH HER FRENCH WAS BAD ENOUGH BUT THIS REALLY DOES TOP IT OFF FOR ME.

MY MUM IS COMING LATER SHE WILL KNOW WHAT TO TELL ME TO DO!

I HOPE YOU HAVE ALL HAD A GOOD DAY TODAY...THANKS FOR THE COMMENTS ABOUT ME TRYING TO DO THE GRAPHICS! THINK I WILL TRY AND FIND AN ON-LINE COURSE ABOUT IT.

TAKE CARE AND LOTS OF WARM FELLINGS FROM ME TO YOU

LOVE

JOANNE

THIS IS ME AND MY SPECIAL GIRL

YAY!!!

THANKS FOR THE PICTURES YOU MADE ME SARA!

JOANNE

JUST MY LUCK!

WELL I'VE MANAGED TO GET A PIC OF A HEART!!

THE OTHERS DON'T SEEM TO WANT TO WORK...MUST BE A FAULT WITH IT AS SARA HAS POINTED OUT TO ME!!

NEVER MIND I WILL KEEP PLAYING AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS SO APPOLOGIES IF MY JOURNAL LOOKS A BIT SILLY!

JOANNE

HERE WE GO!

 

 

 

WELL THIS IS MY FIRST ATTEMPT AT GRAPHICS THANKS TO SARA!

HOP YOU CAN SEE THEM...I CANT!!

JOANNE...THANKS SARA

i need your help!

as you know i am new to doing journals. i have been looking at the links that other people have left me and must admit i am total jelous of some of them. the reason...they are gorgeous to look at!

would someone like to take on the task of trying to explain to me how you go about putting such lovely graphics in your journals?

i'm quit new to the computer and am yet to work out how it works so if someone does want to teach me it will have to be easy...don't worry i'm not thick and will pick it up in no time!

i'm waiting to see how my day goes before adding my entry today...bethany was really upset before school this morning crying to go back to the junior department as she doesn't like the high school...think they must be working her too hard! it could also be because she had her first ever french lesson yesterday...she can't even talk english properly so why they are teaching her french is beyond me. i'm sure they know what they are doing though. so i will add my proper entry when she has come home tonight.

love to all

hugs and warm feelings to each and everyone of you...especially my new friend Jeannette!

JOANNE

i'm so annoyed

before i start to rant and rave there is something i want to say. WELL DONE JEANNETTE. Jeannette managed to get to her docs appointment today and i'm really pleased that she managed it. Jeannette is the reason i started my journal and has become my mentor, giving me praise and advising on what i should do in my blog,

Now to the main reason that i felt the need to write this piece today, i hope you don't think it is silly. WHY is it that when i go into a shop and use my debit card to pay for my purchase that 99% of the time the cashier doesn't check that the signature matchs the one on the card?? I know that most people now have a chip and pin card so therefore this doesn't affect them, but for the minority of us that still have to sign surely this is really bad practice. years ago when i worked in a shop we would of been sacked for not using the correct proceedure, but these days people just don't seem to care which for some reason really irritates me big time. I have in fact in the past purchased goods and not even finished signing the slip before the cashier has verrified the card as being mine. why don't you pay with cash then if it makes you so cross,i hear you cry...well why should i? i would rather my purse be stolen with the card in it than no money....as i would never be able to recover stolen money and can cancel my card in an instant. I hope you don't tyhink i am being silly about this...i just had to get it off my chest!

apart fom that i haven't really done much today just the normal things...kids to school then the day with just my little baby bryce. we went and saw my bestest friend in the world this afternoon, Clare. are mums used to be good friens when we were little so it is kind of nice that we are so close now! I have put are picture up for you too see. Clares on the right and i'm on the left of the picture. told you i'd do it clare but you didn't belive me did you!!

i took my "friend" to meet my parents yesterday so that was a bit scarey! they didn't say anything bad about him today when i saw them so i expect that is a good thing! they have gone off on a boat trip today with my dads old work mates. it is for the retired members so i think my mum was a bit put off as she is only 57, never mind mum you might get to see a few ducks!

well i must go now kids all in and will start moaning for food soon! i might come back later...my mind is full of things that i would like to share with anyone who does me the honour of reading my journal...if anyone has any good questions about my lifre and family why don't you put them to me and i will do my best to try and answer them.

bye for now...happy thoughts to all of you

JOANNE

xXxXx

 

wow this is crazy

hi everyone

what a lovely surprise i had this morning to find so many people had read my first journal. i even had comments posted from people who aren't even in this country...that was really cool!! i will try my hardest to get back to every single one of you but the weekends are normally really crazy trying to keep 3 children amused...especially when it is raining like it is today.

bethany is off to her repite carer for the afternoon so that i can have time with my boys and do things that bethany doesn't cope well with...shopping normally wins though i must say!

me and the boys are meeting my new "friend" (as my mum would call him) later...i will keep you all posted on that one. i have only been with him for 8 weeks so we are still at the really early stage, but he seems like a great guy. i do worry though for the children more than anything. my eldest 2 have been through so much already in their lives that sometimes i think i should stay single....but then i think i should have a life myself...do you think i'm selfish??

well i'm gonna have to go but will be back again in a while...baby bryce needs me.

happy thoughts to you all

joanne

xXx

i have added some pics of my babies so you know who i'm going on about!

my first time

well......where do i start?? this is my first try at having a journal so you will all have to bear with me if iys not too good, if anyones reads it that is! I have been inspired to write this by Jeannette who's journal i started to read today...so i want to thank her now and send a big hug to her for encouraging me to start.

i suppose i should tell you about myself. I'm 35 and live near Ipswich in Suffolk. I'm divorced (long story might share it one day) and have three children....Bethany 11, Charlie 9, and the love of my life Baby Bryce 18 months. My daughter has downs syndrome and my son charlie has ADHD, so life is always hectic and there4 is never a dull moment!! As we speak the eldest 2 are winding each other up and no doubt there will be tears shortly! We all live together and are mostly happy.

I'm very lucky to have a lovely mum who helps me out all the time with my kids. My dad is lovely too...thought i had better put that incase he ever reads this...LOVE YOU BOTH SO VERY MUCH!! They live nearby and are the first ones i turn to in times of trouble, which at the moment we seem to be avoiding very well, hope it lasts.

I'm not sure what else i should put but i will put up my photo so if i'm lucky enough to get any readers they will know who it is writing the journal.

Take care and hope you all have a good weekend...mine will be spent doing the normal...chinese takeaway and casualty on the tv!

happiness to everyone

Joanne

good luck Jeannette for monday!!